七月二十八日
我這樣愚昧無知，在你面前如畜類一般。（詩73：22）
這是人順著神自己的心意所作的坦白的承認。在講到他內心的生活時，他說：“我這樣愚昧無知。”平常的文字不能把“愚昧”的意義儘量表達出來。詩人在前面一節也說：“我見惡人的興盛，就嫉妒（有羡慕意）愚昧人”（改譯），這表示他也是愚昧，其中含著罪的成分。他認爲他是這樣的“愚昧”，他用“這樣”兩字加強他的語意：“我這樣愚昧”。怎樣愚昧，他幷沒有說出來。這種愚昧乃是有罪的，這種愚昧是不能輕恕的，而當因他的剛愎和明知故犯受罰，因爲他妒忌惡人眼前的興盛，而忘記要臨到惡人的可怕結局。
我們比詩人更好嗎？我們能說自己聰明的嗎？我們曾說我們已經盡善盡美，或說我們因受刑杖的管教，已把我們的剛愎除去了嗎？嗐，這實在是驕傲！若詩人是愚昧的，仔細省查一下我們豈不更加愚昧嗎？信徒啊！要往後看：你想想在神正以信實待你的時候，你是怎樣疑惑他——想想當你在苦難中他伸手賜更大的福時，你卻說“父啊！不要這樣”，是多麽愚昧；想想你在黑暗之中常念到他寶貴的應許，然而你卻誤解他的旨意，而哭喊著說：“這些事都歸到我身上了！”其實這些事都是互相效力叫你得益處！想想你怎樣因行樂幷揀選罪，其實那種樂趣實在是你吃苦的根源！若我們知道我們的心是什麽樣子，我們就不能不承認我們的愚昧是有罪的；要解除這種“愚昧”，惟有用詩人的話作爲我們的禱告：“你要以你的訓言引導我。”
July 28
“So foolish was I, and ignorant; I was as a beast
before Thee.” — Psalm 73:22
Remember this is the
confession of the man after God’s own heart; and in telling us his inner life,
he writes, “So foolish was I, and ignorant.” The word
“foolish,” here, means more than it signifies in ordinary language.
David, in a former verse of the Psalm, writes, “I was envious at the
foolish when I saw the prosperity of the wicked,” which shows that the
folly he intended had sin in it. He puts himself down as being thus
“foolish,” and adds a word which is to give intensity to it; “so
foolish was I.” How foolish he could not tell. It was a sinful folly, a
folly which was not to be excused by frailty, but to be condemned because of
its perverseness and wilful ignorance, for he had been envious of the present
prosperity of the ungodly, forgetful of the dreadful end awaiting all such. And
are we better than David that we should call ourselves wise! Do we profess that
we have attained perfection, or to have been so chastened that the rod has
taken all our wilfulness out of us? Ah, this were pride indeed! If David was
foolish, how foolish should we be in our own esteem if we could but see
ourselves! Look back, believer: think of your doubting God when He has been so
faithful to you–think of your foolish outcry of “Not so, my Father,”
when He crossed His hands in affliction to give you the larger blessing; think
of the many times when you have read His providences in the dark,
misinterpreted His dispensations, and groaned out, “All these things are
against me,” when they are all working together for your good! Think how
often you have chosen sin because of its pleasure, when indeed, that pleasure
was a root of bitterness to you! Surely if we know our own heart we must plead
guilty to the indictment of a sinful folly; and conscious of this
“foolishness,” we must make David’s consequent resolve our
own–“Thou shalt guide me with Thy counsel.”
