七月二十八日
我这样愚昧无知，在你面前如畜类一般。（诗73：22）
这是人顺着神自己的心意所作的坦白的承认。在讲到他内心的生活时，他说：“我这样愚昧无知。”平常的文字不能把“愚昧”的意义尽量表达出来。诗人在前面一节也说：“我见恶人的兴盛，就嫉妒（有羡慕意）愚昧人”（改译），这表示他也是愚昧，其中含着罪的成分。他认爲他是这样的“愚昧”，他用“这样”两字加强他的语意：“我这样愚昧”。怎样愚昧，他幷没有说出来。这种愚昧乃是有罪的，这种愚昧是不能轻恕的，而当因他的刚愎和明知故犯受罚，因爲他妒忌恶人眼前的兴盛，而忘记要临到恶人的可怕结局。
我们比诗人更好吗？我们能说自己聪明的吗？我们曾说我们已经尽善尽美，或说我们因受刑杖的管教，已把我们的刚愎除去了吗？嗐，这实在是骄傲！若诗人是愚昧的，仔细省查一下我们岂不更加愚昧吗？信徒啊！要往后看：你想想在神正以信实待你的时候，你是怎样疑惑他——想想当你在苦难中他伸手赐更大的福时，你却说“父啊！不要这样”，是多麽愚昧；想想你在黑暗之中常念到他宝贵的应许，然而你却误解他的旨意，而哭喊著说：“这些事都归到我身上了！”其实这些事都是互相效力叫你得益处！想想你怎样因行乐幷拣选罪，其实那种乐趣实在是你吃苦的根源！若我们知道我们的心是什麽样子，我们就不能不承认我们的愚昧是有罪的；要解除这种“愚昧”，惟有用诗人的话作爲我们的祷告：“你要以你的训言引导我。”
July 28
“So foolish was I, and ignorant; I was as a beast
before Thee.” — Psalm 73:22
Remember this is the
confession of the man after God’s own heart; and in telling us his inner life,
he writes, “So foolish was I, and ignorant.” The word
“foolish,” here, means more than it signifies in ordinary language.
David, in a former verse of the Psalm, writes, “I was envious at the
foolish when I saw the prosperity of the wicked,” which shows that the
folly he intended had sin in it. He puts himself down as being thus
“foolish,” and adds a word which is to give intensity to it; “so
foolish was I.” How foolish he could not tell. It was a sinful folly, a
folly which was not to be excused by frailty, but to be condemned because of
its perverseness and wilful ignorance, for he had been envious of the present
prosperity of the ungodly, forgetful of the dreadful end awaiting all such. And
are we better than David that we should call ourselves wise! Do we profess that
we have attained perfection, or to have been so chastened that the rod has
taken all our wilfulness out of us? Ah, this were pride indeed! If David was
foolish, how foolish should we be in our own esteem if we could but see
ourselves! Look back, believer: think of your doubting God when He has been so
faithful to you–think of your foolish outcry of “Not so, my Father,”
when He crossed His hands in affliction to give you the larger blessing; think
of the many times when you have read His providences in the dark,
misinterpreted His dispensations, and groaned out, “All these things are
against me,” when they are all working together for your good! Think how
often you have chosen sin because of its pleasure, when indeed, that pleasure
was a root of bitterness to you! Surely if we know our own heart we must plead
guilty to the indictment of a sinful folly; and conscious of this
“foolishness,” we must make David’s consequent resolve our
own–“Thou shalt guide me with Thy counsel.”
